Pattie Davis

     ’Tis the season’ is an often heard description of the time from Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years.  It is a time when joy and happiness are suppose to reign supreme.  For most, maybe.  There are many who endure through this time of happiness bearing grief and depression.  So much so that many people are posting on Facebook the suicide prevention hotline number.

     We have so much in the way of turmoil in our lives and if you read or listen to the news media the pile of trouble is dumped on our collective psyche.  We have an inordinately high number of veterans that commit suicide everyday in this country and the efforts by those who should care are diverted by other ‘social ills and issues’.  Compound the personal tragedies and it is almost hard not to get down a bit even if everything is going good in your life.

     A friend of mine just lost a grandson in an accident and the grief that the family and friends feel is magnified by the season that we are going through.  Words cannot make the sadness of losing a young vibrant life and I have never been able to adequately  express my feelings in anyway that will lessen the burden that they are living now.  In the future the family will always equate this time of year with loss.

     I have written often on the loss of a friend or loved one and the effects that that has had on my life.  The thing about sadness this time of year clouds the fact that we have been blessed beyond comprehension in this life.  I often wonder about those who have no faith and believe in nothing but the things of this world.  How does anyone without the rock solid belief that there are better things beyond this world manage to grieve?

     It is so easy to look back and see mistakes and opportunities lost, but hindsight is 20/20.  It is so easy to look in the past and see the bad and yet the good is there also.  We learn from the past which is why, maybe, that I am so hooked on history.  The lessons for our future lay in our past.  The measurement of our success now is defined by our past.

      I could choose to be down, and sometimes it is a fight, about lost loves, opportunities, and mistakes.  But to grow and be a success requires us to put into the perspective that the past is only changed by how you go forward.

     Grieving is a necessary part of life and each has to deal with it in our own ways.  The loss of health, friends, loved ones, and the perceived loss of worldly things is a required no exemption part of life.  All I can offer is a word of comfort, a shoulder to lean on, a willingness to listen, and knowing that in the end the real joy of the season will break through our sadness and fill us with joy.

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